We received a call last night from OD's friend's mother and step-father. They wanted to inform me that she was supposed to be at either her father's house or a friend of her mother's home and not with us. I told them that the father asked for her to stay at our home because he lives around 30 minutes each way from here and wasn't sure how he'd get her to school in the morning.
They told me that they thought I should have called them and let them know she was at our house. I patiently explained that they obviously had my phone number and were free to check with us but that I'm certainly not responsible for keeping them informed regarding their daughter's whereabouts.
I was pleasant but firm and we left it that she would sleep here last night but that she was expected to be at those other places tonight and if she wasn't they would call the police to aid in finding her. Psychotic or what? I don't know if it was a veiled threat but I'm pretty sure that when I finished speaking to the police the mother and step-father would have regretted that decision.
Anyway, at around 8:10 tonight OD and her friend walk in the door and tell me that her father spoke with her mother and that they both agreed that she could stay here if it was ok with us.
I insisted that she call her mother and have her mother ask me if it was ok for her to stay here with us. I did it so the mother would have to swallow her pride and ask me for my permission, especially since she was such a bitch last night. It also made OD's friend feel better knowing that she had an adult witness to the whole thing and that her mother couldn't spin it differently tomorrow.
The poor girl is a wreck. I know there are two sides to every story, but I'm having a hard time seeing there's.
Posted by bbarton at April 14, 2005 07:59 PMYes, good on you, Bartons, for giving the poor girl a refuge. What's going to happen next, though? I'm guessing that must be worrying you. One day at a time, though, I suppose. Nothing else you can do.
Posted by: Deirdre on April 15, 2005 08:05 AMThanks, Grannyp. I've not always felt like I'm doing the best job, but we must be doing something right. The only problem is that once you figure everything out, they're grown, and nobody with new kids wants to hear the advice. LOL
You're right, Deirdre. We're just doing one day at a time and hoping that everything turns out for the best.
Posted by: Bob on April 15, 2005 09:58 AMObviously that bitty don't realize how good life is: Not only should she be sickly satisfied that her daughter isn't with her ex, but the girl's being well cared-for to boot, mooching off her friend's family for both psychological and physical support.
I'm being sarcastic, of course. I'm sure you're fair and giving and that poor girl is in need. Thank God you're there, with all you have on your hands you can still give this girl a home. Good things happen to good people, life's road will be good to you as well.
Keep the faith, and peace to you.
Posted by: Jim on April 16, 2005 07:49 PM
Think sometimes that the parents of teenagers are more of a problem than teenagers themselves. But noone has yet written the manual.
Hasten to say I doubt you'd be included among the problem ps. More than not doubt - I'm SURE.
Posted by: grannyp on April 15, 2005 06:30 AM